daddysden, Dads, Family
Writtem by Guest Blogger Chris Mancini
The title is not an exaggeration. Last year, comedian Graham Elwood and I started comedyfilmnerds.com since we were so tired of trying to get work with web companies or any other company for that matter. So we thought we should just become competitors. Of course we were doing it all ourselves and on less than a shoestring. So everything took longer and the credit card balances went up for both of us.
Our goals were ambitious. We wanted to feature movie reviews and columns written by professional comedians, interviews and comedy CDs, DVDs and books available for sale along with movie downloads. We’re a mix of Filmthreat, Amazon and ITunes. So our site was cobbled together with duct tape and off we went. And then it crashed and didn’t work. Many times. That has mostly been corrected.
Audge was on maternity leave while we started everything. We were so excited. We moved my office into the garage and that was going to be the baby’s bedroom. At first I was disappointed but if anyone with children knows, to have a room detached from the rest of the house is much more awesome than either parent will let on to the other.
So every Tuesday Graham comes over and we play “internet moguls” in the garage. We have a blast. We laugh, work, and strategize. And then we try to slowly learn how to get people to come to our website.
But my wife’s maternity leave ended and she soon went back to work and I was suddenly a stay at home dad/comedian/author/filmmaker/web guy. It’s been tough, but we’re getting through it. We’re both working double shifts as we switch off from work and childcare duties and try and get a few hours of sleep in the process. Between working on the website, finishing the book and doing an occasional show there wasn’t been much time left.
So Graham and I shifted our website schedule to later in the day and my son Griffin was now part of the mix. He would be present at the reading of the minutes and have voting rights during board meetings.
So now Griffin is almost a year old, and it’s been about a year since we launched the site. But now Griffin is crawling and he won’t stay in the “bouncy chair” whileF Graham and I struggle and take an hour to try and add a jpeg image of a T-shirt to our online shopping cart.
There are times when Graham holds the baby as I look up a purchase order or find out who Doug Benson is supposed to make a CD out to. The first time I asked him I just flat out said, “Is that weird, that I’m asking you to hold the baby?” He laughed and said no, he has many nieces and nephews and much practice. So I gave Griffin to Graham and he instantly took to him and tried to rip his necklace off. I think it was made of shark teeth or something because Graham’s a surfer and they… all fight sharks, right?
Now you expect comedians to make you laugh, get drunk, hit on waitresses and pass out in a back alley of a club somewhere. OK, we’ve all done it. But it’s a weird picture to see two comedians taking care of a baby. It’s an especially weird picture for the actual comedians.
But here’s the thing: I’ve never been happier. I’m doing my own thing. Taking care of my baby, running a business and there is no one to answer to. If I’m going to learn how to use a website content management system and learn how to use Microsoft Accounting (and I’m still learning, very slowly), I’m going to do it for me, and not anyone else.
I’m sure our company would be making millions of dollars right now if we had things like a staff and a marketing budget. And maybe a new computer. But it is making a little money, thanks to the support of comedy and film fans, comedians, filmmakers, advertisers and other people supporting us along with one intern who is trying to figure out a nice way of telling us she’s too busy to help us anymore. And of course the support from OMM during my book release (PACIFY ME: A HANDBOOK FOR THE FREAKED OUT NEW DAD) has been amazing.
We’re in the middle of rebuilding comedyfilmnerds.com (we originally called it comedyfilmnerdsdotcom.com but it was screwing up navigation and links) and my son is getting bigger. I can see the growth in every part of my life right now, and it feels good. Having children changes your perspective for the better. WAY better. And starting my own business has changed it even more. I’m not “industry obsessed” or constantly “waiting for someone to call me back” anymore. And even if I’m having a bad day, Griffin smiles at me and then it simply doesn’t matter anymore. Now about that million dollars…
Chris Mancini is a comedian and author. His first book “Pacify Me: A Handbook for the Freaked-Out New Dad” is now available for purchase. Enter to win the book for FREE!
daddysden, Dads, Family
Written by Chris Mancini
It’s always a treat to go to Whole Foods. It’s good food, it’s fresh, and everything tastes pretty good. Yes, it’s a great experience until you get to the cashier and you always think they made a mistake. I actually took a bag of grapes back because I thought $15 for the bag was a mistake. It wasn’t. No one needs grapes that badly, even of your winery just burned down.
With two kids, I want them to eat healthier. I want to eat healthier. So why is it now so freaking hard? When as a society did we get to the point where it costs more to have less shit in our food? “Oh, you want food that’s not going to kill you? Now THAT will cost you…”
So we’re trying to adjust our budget so we can afford food that won’t kill us. We mix in visits with Trader Joe’s and try to eat out less. And I told our three year old daughter that she’s now going to trade school instead of college but to enjoy the organic broccoli.
But there are other reasons I do love Whole Foods. There is entertainment value while you’re shopping. I love watching overly thin women in baseball caps take four hours to pick out the right vitamins. I also love watching the “poser” healthy people. The ones who want to be seen and want you to think “Look how healthy I am! I shop at Whole Foods. Look, I have a bottle of water in my hand right now.” You know afterwards they go home, eat four packages of Ding Dongs and then throw up. My wife even had a friend who would go there just to pick up men. And was never unsuccessful.
I love Whole Foods because they are trying to help me and my family eat healthier. I hate them because they are expensive and they shouldn’t be. I’m angry that it costs more to get fruit not covered in pesticides and food without chemicals in it whose names I can’t even pronounce. It shouldn’t cost more to get actual maple syrup out of a tree than to manufacture it in a giant vat from a bunch of chemicals. So until Costco goes organic, my second mortgage and I will be at Whole Foods.
Chris Mancini
www.daddyneedssomealonetime.blogspot.com
daddysden, Dads, Family
We’re getting ready for the new baby. I’m losing my office but gaining a son. I’ve been putting off going through my office because I didn’t want to face the fact that I’d be moving it into the garage. My office was my personal space. I didn’t want to lose it.
But July 15 is right around the corner. It’s going to be a C-Section, so it’s scheduled for July 15. Unless it rains, then it will be the 16th or 17th. So I stared at the Herculean task before me. Going through the closet.
See, the closet was basically a nostalgia and pop-culture themed oubliette for me. Anything I didn’t want to get rid of I threw in the closet and then forgot about it. It was a “walk in” closet, but hasn’t been for a very long time. More of a “walk away from” closet.
I found all sorts of things in the closet. I found an MP3 player that had no memory. I found a Sony Discman. It could play one whole compact disc at a time! I found old video games. I tried to load one on my computer and it didn’t work. I found old photos. Old letters. Old video tapes with things I can’t even explain on them. Why did I keep a documentary on farming in China?
As I was going through the boxes I found some of my old short film movie props. I was going through them and Bella was enjoying them as well. My wife looked at them and asked if I was going to keep them. “Are you kidding? You’ll never know when you’ll need a rubber chicken, a bicycle horn or a Leprechaun hat.” She looked at me like I was being funny. The thing is, I meant it. I’m keeping everything from the street cleaner costumes to the giant novelty sunglasses. I’m just moving them into the garage.
We’ve talked about moving into the garage for a while, and it’s almost ready. Soon it became a running gag.
“Is it okay if my friends from back east visit for a week after the baby is born?” my wife asked.
“I don’t care, I’ll be in the garage.”
“…You’re not going to be living out there. Are you?”
So while I’m saddened that I have to give up a space that meant a lot to me over the years, I’m looking forward to the garage and making it into my own new space. It will be my new personal “man-cave” that I can mold again from the ground up. In the meantime I’m also looking forward to giving my new son his own space as well. We’re guys. Space is important to us.
daddysden, Dads, Family
A Walk to the Park
On Sunday my wife wanted to get her car washed. And she’s pregnant. Needless to say she was going to get her car washed. So that left me with our three year old daughter, Isabella. She wanted to go to the park. Fine.
We decided we would walk there, just the two of us. As we walked she was looking at her surroundings with wonder in her eyes. I stopped and noticed this. Remember when everything was big and new? It was so long ago. I tried to remember walks with my parents and how everything looked so absolutely huge, endless, and full of wonder.
As we walked Isabella looked at every car and compared them to Mommy and Daddy’s car. She then compared my car to a Mercury Grand Marquis and I had to correct her. A Volkswagen Passat is NOT the same. Never too early to learn the difference. Plus, the Grand Marquis was up on blocks.
We continued walking. We saw two outdoor cats. They came over to say hi and we petted them. Bella got a real kick out of this. She looked at both of them, petted one of them and started talking about them.
We kept walking and she talked about the cats, the spider webs she saw in the hedges, and the swing at the park. This was her day. Her world. Me, I was thinking about work, bills, and how I could trick my wife into letting be buy a Playstation 3 even though we’re supposed to be saving up for the new baby. But then I made myself stop. I looked around and thought about it. I looked at the trees. Although we live in LA we are fortunate enough to have trees in our neighborhood. It’s Paper. Our lives are ruled by paper. Paper that was once trees. Sometimes you really have to stop and look at the trees. And then feel guilty about using so much paper.
We continued walking. Only a block or two now. So when does the “Brazil”-like avalanche of paperwork begin? It already has. Grandmom bought our daughter Disney stock one year as a gift, and it cracks me up every year when Isabella gets her shareholders proxy voting material in the mail. I give it to her anyway. If she wants to draw on it, tear it up, or fill in a vote for the board of directors that’s her business.
So we made it to the park. Bella went on the swings and the slides. She didn’t want to leave but it was getting really crowded. Sadly, overpopulation in the parks as well. There are kids who are far too big for the structures on them because they have nowhere else to go. But one complaint at a time. Bella never cares how crowded something is as long as she gets her turn. After 10 “this is the last time’s on the slide we were finally able to leave.
I didn’t want to walk back so I had Mommy pick us up on her way back from the car wash. She couldn’t find a parking spot. So she parked in the handicapped spot. She is pregnant, so that’s not really that far from the truth. On a side note, I still let her do a lot of the housework because I don’t want her to feel uncomfortable that I’m treating her differently just because she’s pregnant. That wouldn’t be right.
But I digress. It was MAYBE four seconds into the car when my wife said “Now Bella leave your shoes on because I just got the car washed and I don’t want sand—“ Too late. How so much sand can fit in such tiny shoes is a complete mystery. It’s like the footwear equivalent of a toddler clown car.
So in the three minute drive back to our house I thought about our walk to the park. Sometimes when it gets to be too much, too big and too stressful, change your perspective. Just take a walk to the park. But do it in your toddler’s tiny shoes. You’ll be smiling before you know it.
By Chris Mancini
http://www.daddyneedssomealonetime.blogspot.com
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