10 Steps to Becoming a Self-Employed Parent (Or What to Expect When You Are Expecting to Work from Home)
You can get just about anything you need to start your business for free. Basic websites, templates, voicemail boxes, advertising opportunities, legal advice, newsletter services, even business cards. Some services are free for only a certain amount of time, so take advantage while you can. Check out the OurMilkMoney.com Resource Page for a list of services that are free or minimal. Talk to other parents and ask them about the resources that they use. Everything else can be bartered – especially with other self-employed parents- and that is who you want to be supporting from now on, anyway. It’s good karma. Trust me, it always comes back to you.
Self-employed Parent Enthusiast Ally Loprete is the Founder of OurMilkMoney.com, a nationwide online business directory of self-employed parents, and the host of This Little Parent Stayed Home, a live weekly radio show which is a part of the Her Insight Group on Toginet.com. Ally is on a mission to help others deal with the sometimes overwhelming prospect of leaving a full time job to start a new business, while running a full time household and raising kids. She is resolute about creating a haven in which parents across the nation will continue to thrive and obtain the support they need in their personal journeys.
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daddysden, Dads
By Nathan Bright
We’re a one-income family. I haven’t worked for two point five years. My wife’s employment is based on a federal grant. The government is amputating limbs to save green. You see where this is going.
Spring 2011… that’s when Uncle Sam turns off our financial faucet. Worry. Fear. Anxiety. And those are just the feelings our dog has shared with us.
Many families are facing tough times. I will say it’s harder when the only bread winner takes a hit. If we both did the daily grind it would merely be matters of tightening our belt, cutting back and sacrificing. We’ve already juggled those three to get where we’re at, so now what?
All is not doom and gloom. There is a slight possibility my wife can make a lateral move, but I stress the phrase “slight possibility.” Nothing is carved into stone. The light is now cast on me.
High School Counselor: “So, Nathan, what do you want to do?”
Me: “I don’t know.”
High School Counselor: “What do you like to do?”
Me: “I don’t know.”
High School Counselor: “If you could do anything, regardless of money, what would it be?”
Me: “Get massages from super models while playing video games and drinking beer from one of those helmets that have the tubes running down from two beers. And there’d be chocolate cake.”
High School Counselor: “That’s illogical.”
Me: “Don’t ask stupid questions. Now I’m craving beer.”
I’ve polished up my résumé, but I find myself in an eerily similar situation as in high school. I’m an excellent worker – smart, innovative, don’t gossip, buy thoughtful holiday presents for under $10 – but what employer would hire someone like me when they can choose from barrels of specialized talent floating in the recession pool?
Another question – do I act now or wait? We’re under a cloud of uncertainty, but me securing a job now would alleviate that stress. But then what? Throw the kids into daycare just to find out in seven months we didn’t have to? Uhgg.
Fortunately we have time to make decisions. My resume is also getting a much-needed sand blasting. I can say with confidence we don’t regret a single moment of providing the kids with a stay-at-home parent. They’ve benefitted greatly from this experience, and we’re optimistic about the next phase of our lives.
As for me, I’m brushing up my skills in order to land my dream job: I’m giving the dog a massage while she eats cake… she looks pretty stressed. I’ll drink the beer.
Nathan Bright is a 30-something stay-at-home dad who resides near St. Louis, MO. He is a husband to an amazing woman and father to a doubly amazing 2 year old little girl. His blessed home is scheduled to be even more blessed in March, as Nathan and his wife will welcome a second daughter to their family. When Nathan is not blogging for OurMilkMoney.com’s The Daddy’s Den, he writes and illustrates his own children’s books. Available for purchase immediately is Maddi Patti and her Stay-at-Home-Daddy.
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Community, Member Contributions
A change in lifestyle is a big deal. Heck, just changing jobs is a challenge! Going from a career to a home based business or being a stay-at-home parent can be quite stressful. For many, the change is a no-brainer. But for others, a little patience is in order. If you’re finding the transition tough, here are a few guidelines to help you move through the changes and actually derive benefit from the experience.
1. Have compassion for yourself. Avoid berating yourself for decisions or choices. The past is behind you. Let it go. All there is is NOW.
2. Slow your life down. Taking a few things off your plate will free up the energy to redesign your lifestyle. Delegate responsibilities and ask for help from loved ones.
3. Journal your feelings and/or appoint a confidant you feel you can be open with and who won’t judge you. Don’t allow the judgments of others define who you are. You have a right to choose, and that includes the choice to continue working if you want to.
4. If you decide to take the leap, join a support group designed for stay-at-home parents. There are also plenty of books on the market. Once you leave your job, your circle of friends may shift a little. Make a point not to isolate as you acclimate.
Remember change is personal, and don’t allow other people’s urging to “get over it” interfere with your process.
Are you contemplating a change of lifestyle? Would you like support? Please email me privately at successmadesimple.jc@gmail.com and I’ll sign you up for Two Months FREE Membership to my monthly Mama Come Home! teleclasses.
Judith Cassis,C.Ht. is a Personal Development Consultant with 26 years experience. Known as “The Bounce-Back Coach”, she works with people who are “bouncing back” from failure, loss or tragedy. Judith is co-owner of a small newspaper,Tidbits of Santa Clarita Valley, www.tidbitsscv.com a family business she and her husband, Lee Cadena run with their sons. Through a monthly teleseries, Mama Come Home, Judith supports mothers in staying home or returning home to raise their children.
Family, Uncategorized
I am back from my wonderful, much needed family vacation!! It’s been years since we did something like this.
I started organizing and packing up the family at least 4 weeks before our excursion to the other side of the country, the entire time wondering if the trek with 2 young and energetic boys, the rising level of our expenses and my loss in sanity would be worth sitting on a beach for a week.
It was.
It was, it was, it was.
I am eternally grateful for all the relatives who were drooling to spend time with my children- and did, leaving me with REAL legitimate relaxation…not the kind that is interrupted every 5 minutes with a child’s need for attention. I took complete advantage.
Some listen to music while on the sandy beach, others like to read. I choose to sand sculpt.
To me, there is nothing like sitting in the silk soft sand for hours and hours, getting filthy dirty the way I used to when I was a child, letting my mind wander freely and creating something from my deepest imagination. Sand sculpting is cathartic, therapeutic and cleansing. My only stress was wondering when the tide might come to wash it all away, and even that became less of a stress after a few days, and more of a way for me to feel part of the universe.
It was a terrific lesson of the natural process of all the we are and all that we are a part of. The tide, although different each and every day is something we can come to count on, toying with us, supporting us, watching what we build for hours before it slowly comes in little by little to wear our creations down…eventually until there isn’t even a sign of our work.
Yet, we don’t cry over it- we build a new creation the next day. I am glad to be back, and especially grateful that I was able to take with me a new sense of purpose and bliss. My sandcastles may be gone forever, but the construction of my spirit has given me a strong foundation for living a long and happy life.
Art is good for the soul.
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Julianne Wish, Member Contributions
by Julianne Alvarez-Wish
In the ‘good ole days’ kids used to be able to play outside and walk places with very little to fear. I certainly did as a child. I would go out to play after school and had to be home by a certain time as did my friends. There was little adult supervision.
The same cannot be said of today’s environment unfortunately. In the blink of an eye, children, young adults, women and even young men are kidnapped, attacked and worse. Also, there are children in school suffering from being bullied.
We do all we can as parents to ensure the safety of our families and nothing should substitute for that. However, adding good tools to our ‘toolbox’ for caring for our families is a terrific idea and I’m all for adding security and some peace of mind.
One such idea is the line of ISafe Bags. The ISafe Bags were created by a Chicago entrepreneur. He heard about a woman who was attacked by four men. The story upset him so much he decided to do something about it to help protect people from attacks.
In full disclosure, I did receive an ISafe Bag at no cost to review. No other compensation was provided and all opinions are fully my own and in no way influenced by the receipt of the bag.
ISafe Bags look like regular back packs, laptop backpacks, or laptop messenger bags. They come in an array of colors that will please children and adults alike. I reviewed the pink laptop messenger bag. My laptop fit in the bag easily as did a bunch of other things I carry with it. It’s functional, pretty, light, durable and well-constructed. It has lots of pockets for storage and even has a handy removable key ring. I love it!
Hiding in each of these bags is an alarm system with a strobe light. The alarm is quite loud and the strobe light is very bright…they will easily attract help to whoever set off the alarm. Another great feature is that the alarm and strobe light system are very light, only adding 1/2 pound to the weight of the bag so you won’t get tired carrying it around.
ISafe Bags are easy to activate and deactivate. ISafe Bags also have a replacement policy. When your bag gets worn out, you can purchase a pre-wired bag from ISafe Bags at a fraction of the cost of the original. Simply insert the alarm system into the new bag and you are all set!
The ISafe Bags web site is full of useful information from who should use the bags, common uses, to alarm system operating instructions. There is a link for personal safety tips for women and children. The web site will also feature a video on how to hook up the replacement bag to your alarm system.
The line of ISafe Bags are a terrific way to add some security and peace of mind to life using an ordinary item many use daily…what’s not to like! I highly recommend them!
Julianne Alvarez-Wish is a military wife, mother, business owner, professional writer, blogger and legislative advocate. She is the Director of Communications for Our Milk Money, the Colorado State Leader for the National Association for Moms in Business and the owner of Buy By Mom and Buy By Mom Blog. She is the Colorado Springs Stay-at-Home Mom Examiner for Examiner.com. She also blogs at Wishful Thinking. Her passion, purpose and goal is to help parents work from home so they can be home with their children.
Community, Family, Member Contributions
Even with all the benefits to you and your family, making the choice to come home after working a job will be HUGE. It’s not unusual for our identities to be wrapped up in what we do. When that changes, it can take a minute to recover. Be patient with yourself through these changes. Acknowledge your loss and have compassion for yourself.
Change and loss come in many forms. For instance, we all know what it feels like to lose friends. Relationships have ended for each of us. A job or career is a form of relationship. The pain we feel from these losses corresponds directly with the depth of our investment of emotion. The greater our love, the deeper our pain. Remember the quote, “It’s a far better thing to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.” It’s true. Really. Even when it comes to your job or career.
When it comes to moving through changes, there’s no way around it. The only way out of it is through it, and going through it is what change is all about. We heal the past and discover the future. We learn compassion. We experience forgiveness; of those we believe have transgressed, of life for bringing change in the first place and most of all, of ourselves. And self forgiveness is the key that unlocks the door to a deeper experience of life. Are you ready to step over the threshold?
Are you contemplating a change of lifestyle? Would you like support? Please email me privately at successmadesimple.jc@gmail.com and I’ll sign you up for Two Months FREE Membership to my monthly Mama Come Home! teleclasses.
Judith Cassis,C.Ht. is a Personal Development Consultant with 26 years experience. Known as “The Bounce-Back Coach”, she works with people who are “bouncing back” from failure, loss or tragedy. Judith is co-owner of a small newspaper,Tidbits of Santa Clarita Valley, www.tidbitsscv.com a family business she and her husband, Lee Cadena run with their sons. Through a monthly teleseries, Mama Come Home, Judith supports mothers in staying home or returning home to raise their children.
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Community, Member Contributions
What? You don’t remember ever asking yourself this question? Trust me, if you’re over the age of five, you have – and the opportunity will present itself again, many times over.
On the first day of preschool or Kindergarten, you scanned your surroundings; the room full of children, the teacher and more friggin’ toys than you had ever seen in one place. You wondered, Who am I and where do I fit in? In time you learned, you acclimated and found the part of you that connected with the experience.
Fast forward eight to ten years: adolescence. Changes abound – physical changes, mood shifts and of course, the opposite sex (hmm…why didn’t I notice this before, you asked yourself?) This time, you don’t quite acclimate, but you move through it and on to more change.
One day you wake up and discover you’re no longer a child. You’re a man, a woman. You marry or choose to remain single, you work, have children – or not, and your world opens to a whole new set of changes. Life is just that – beginnings and endings, births and deaths, starts and stops – change. It’s not change itself that’s most significant. How we respond to that change defines our quality of life.
If you’re a working parent trying to find your way back home, or if you’re a stay-at-home parent who needs an income, expect change that will rock your world. It may not be easy, but your commitment will see you through. Just take it a step at a time. It’ll all be worth it.
Are you contemplating a change of lifestyle? Would you like support? Please email me privately at successmadesimple.jc@gmail.com and I’ll sign you up for Two Months FREE Membership to my monthly Mama Come Home! teleclasses.
Judith Cassis,C.Ht. is a Personal Development Consultant with 26 years experience. Known as “The Bounce-Back Coach”, she works with people who are “bouncing back” from failure, loss or tragedy. Judith is co-owner of a small newspaper,Tidbits of Santa Clarita Valley, www.tidbitsscv.com a family business she and her husband, Lee Cadena run with their sons. Through a monthly teleseries, Mama Come Home, Judith supports mothers in staying home or returning home to raise their children.
Community, Family, Member Contributions
Do you work from home? Would you like to? More and more people are moving home to work, and I couldn’t be happier for them! Although the circumstances around these situations aren’t always the best; lost jobs for instance, I firmly believe that at least for women, families are much happier in the long run. Even if it means sacrificing a playroom for a home office, kids will have a better life with Mama close at hand. Trust me, it doesn’t take long to get used to picking up toys off the living room floor every night. Think of it as exercise. Back straight, bend, squat, up and again…2,3,4.
I went back to finish college when my firstborn was 3 months old. (Insert sound of heart wrenching). A couple of years later, after waiting tables for a full year while trying to launch my business, I was finally able to chuck my apron, pack my brief case and come home. I’m still working from home 25 years later. (Check my notes on face book for the whole story).
There were a couple of stints over those two and a half decades that I tried to – brace yourself, I’m about to say it – work a job. There. Whew! I got it out. Those experiences lasted about 6 months each and were truly wonderful in many ways, but honestly, I couldn’t wait to get back home. Besides, I was still running my home-based business so my work load was heavy.
Are you contemplating a change of lifestyle? Would you like support? Please email me privately at successmadesimple.jc@gmail.com and I’ll sign you up for Two Months FREE Membership to my monthly Mama Come Home! teleclasses.
Judith Cassis,C.Ht. is a Personal Development Consultant with 26 years experience. Known as “The Bounce-Back Coach”, she works with people who are “bouncing back” from failure, loss or tragedy. Judith is co-owner of a small newspaper,Tidbits of Santa Clarita Valley, www.tidbitsscv.com a family business she and her husband, Lee Cadena run with their sons. Through a monthly teleseries, Mama Come Home, Judith supports mothers in staying home or returning home to raise their children.
Family, Uncategorized
It doesn’t matter how many times we are warned. We don’t get it until we are actually experiencing it. And maybe that is the point after all. Maybe we were meant to experience our own journeys. Why allow others to warn us when life is supposed to be lived by each of us, personally?
I think about this often when I am going through the trials and tribulations of… well just about every aspect of my life. 4 1/2 years ago I was not yet a mother, or a business owner…and when I look back at that time- it almost makes me laugh at how “empty” my life was. I was a baby myself.
I never thought motherhood would be like THIS. I never thought I could become selfless, where it would actually be difficult to do things for myself without putting my children first. I never thought I would forget to eat. I never would have trusted myself as a business owner. I never would have had the gumption to “prepare for attack” to a complete stranger who had insulted my son- like a lioness ready to pounce. I never thought I’d be utterly insulted that my child wasn’t chosen to be a Jedi at the Disney Star Wars Training Camp. Couldn’t they see that he was clearly the most adorable kid in the group?
I never thought I would forget what it feels like to be bored, and actually long for it on some days. I never thought I would feel this kind of love for a child- when honestly other people’s kids never did it for me. I never thought I’d be okay with sacrificing so much of our lifestyle- just so I could afford to stay home every day. I never thought I’d yearn for adult interaction this much- and then when I finally have a night out without the kids, I never thought I’d miss them as much as I did. I never thought I could love a second child as much as the first, and was surprised to learn that it made me love them BOTH even more.
I never knew my kids were going to turn out so terrific, so beautiful and smart and talented, and hilarious. I never knew I’d be so happy with 2 boys, and be okay with not having a darling little girl to dress up with little dresses and bows. I never thought I’d be able to work this hard for no pay.
I guess I am glad I didn’t listen to the warnings. It’s so much better experiencing it all for myself.
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Community, Member Contributions
by Judith Cassis
Many of us believe we have no choice but to work full time jobs for someone else. True for a few, but many of us do have a choice. Hold on – don’t let that statement ruffle your feathers. I didn’t say it would be easy, but whether for ourselves or someone else, working from home is doable. It’s a commitment we CAN make, even an inch at a time, when we step into our passion and make the right choices. We may have to give up a few things or put them off until later in life, but please take it from one who now looks back in gratitude for the choices I made when my children were young; I trust you’ll see it will have been worthwhile. All of it!
Recently, my 19 year old son came up and gave me a hug and said, “Mom, I’m so glad you worked from home when I was young.”
Wow. I didn’t think he would have the maturity to reflect on that until he had his own kids, if ever.
After I got over my shock, I asked him what he meant. He told me a few things I’ll never forget; things that warmed my heart. He said he was grateful our family was so close and that he felt comfortable talking to my husband and me about his life. I credit this in a big way to the time we all spent together running our family business from home.
Are you contemplating a change of lifestyle? Would you like support? Please email me privately at successmadesimple.jc@gmail.com and I’ll sign you up for Two Months FREE Membership to my monthly Mama Come Home! teleclasses.
Judith Cassis,C.Ht. is a Personal Development Consultant with 26 years experience. Known as “The Bounce-Back Coach”, she works with people who are “bouncing back” from failure, loss or tragedy. Judith is co-owner of a small newspaper,Tidbits of Santa Clarita Valley, www.tidbitsscv.com a family business she and her husband, Lee Cadena run with their sons. Through a monthly teleseries, Mama Come Home, Judith supports mothers in staying home or returning home to raise their children.
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