Family, Member Contributions
I admit that sometimes I am a hypocrite.
Along with that mea culpa is the acknowledgment that I am far from perfect…and while I strive every day to improve myself a little more, perfection is simply not the goal.
Yesterday was a perfect example of my hypocrisy: While writing for my weekly column in Tidbits magazine, I let my frustration get the better of me and yelled at my kids for interrupting me while I was attempting to work.
The ironic hypocrisy is that I was writing a column about how important it is not to attempt to work when you should be parenting, which may very well result in lost concentration, unnecessary yelling, and the resentment of everyone involved.
I was so caught up in my determination to get my task completed that I nearly failed to see the paradox…which borders on amusing.
Perhaps admitting to you now that I am an imperfect mother, full of hypocrisy makes me less of a liar, but the truth is, I am no different than you.
Before you take offense, let me re-phrase. As parents, we do the best we can- and for that we shall be commended. Every day that we are alive is a new opportunity to learn and grow, slip and fall, and get back up again.
I have good days and bad. I am capable of extreme laughter as well as misplaced crankiness. I feel guilt and shame just as often as I feel pride and joy. If there is any lesson in life that keeps presenting itself to us over and over again- it is that the world is constantly balancing itself out.
Everywhere we look there is yin and yang. I am comforted by thoughts such as these, as I hope for you to be. After all, how would we know what a good day is without having a bad day to compare it to?
Hypocrisy is not so bad. It is merely a catalyst for our sincerity. At least, that is how I am justifying my imperfection at the moment.
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Community, Member Contributions
A change in lifestyle is a big deal. Heck, just changing jobs is a challenge! Going from a career to a home based business or being a stay-at-home parent can be quite stressful. For many, the change is a no-brainer. But for others, a little patience is in order. If you’re finding the transition tough, here are a few guidelines to help you move through the changes and actually derive benefit from the experience.
1. Have compassion for yourself. Avoid berating yourself for decisions or choices. The past is behind you. Let it go. All there is is NOW.
2. Slow your life down. Taking a few things off your plate will free up the energy to redesign your lifestyle. Delegate responsibilities and ask for help from loved ones.
3. Journal your feelings and/or appoint a confidant you feel you can be open with and who won’t judge you. Don’t allow the judgments of others define who you are. You have a right to choose, and that includes the choice to continue working if you want to.
4. If you decide to take the leap, join a support group designed for stay-at-home parents. There are also plenty of books on the market. Once you leave your job, your circle of friends may shift a little. Make a point not to isolate as you acclimate.
Remember change is personal, and don’t allow other people’s urging to “get over it” interfere with your process.
Are you contemplating a change of lifestyle? Would you like support? Please email me privately at successmadesimple.jc@gmail.com and I’ll sign you up for Two Months FREE Membership to my monthly Mama Come Home! teleclasses.
Judith Cassis,C.Ht. is a Personal Development Consultant with 26 years experience. Known as “The Bounce-Back Coach”, she works with people who are “bouncing back” from failure, loss or tragedy. Judith is co-owner of a small newspaper,Tidbits of Santa Clarita Valley, www.tidbitsscv.com a family business she and her husband, Lee Cadena run with their sons. Through a monthly teleseries, Mama Come Home, Judith supports mothers in staying home or returning home to raise their children.
Community, Family, Member Contributions
Even with all the benefits to you and your family, making the choice to come home after working a job will be HUGE. It’s not unusual for our identities to be wrapped up in what we do. When that changes, it can take a minute to recover. Be patient with yourself through these changes. Acknowledge your loss and have compassion for yourself.
Change and loss come in many forms. For instance, we all know what it feels like to lose friends. Relationships have ended for each of us. A job or career is a form of relationship. The pain we feel from these losses corresponds directly with the depth of our investment of emotion. The greater our love, the deeper our pain. Remember the quote, “It’s a far better thing to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.” It’s true. Really. Even when it comes to your job or career.
When it comes to moving through changes, there’s no way around it. The only way out of it is through it, and going through it is what change is all about. We heal the past and discover the future. We learn compassion. We experience forgiveness; of those we believe have transgressed, of life for bringing change in the first place and most of all, of ourselves. And self forgiveness is the key that unlocks the door to a deeper experience of life. Are you ready to step over the threshold?
Are you contemplating a change of lifestyle? Would you like support? Please email me privately at successmadesimple.jc@gmail.com and I’ll sign you up for Two Months FREE Membership to my monthly Mama Come Home! teleclasses.
Judith Cassis,C.Ht. is a Personal Development Consultant with 26 years experience. Known as “The Bounce-Back Coach”, she works with people who are “bouncing back” from failure, loss or tragedy. Judith is co-owner of a small newspaper,Tidbits of Santa Clarita Valley, www.tidbitsscv.com a family business she and her husband, Lee Cadena run with their sons. Through a monthly teleseries, Mama Come Home, Judith supports mothers in staying home or returning home to raise their children.
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Community, Member Contributions
What? You don’t remember ever asking yourself this question? Trust me, if you’re over the age of five, you have – and the opportunity will present itself again, many times over.
On the first day of preschool or Kindergarten, you scanned your surroundings; the room full of children, the teacher and more friggin’ toys than you had ever seen in one place. You wondered, Who am I and where do I fit in? In time you learned, you acclimated and found the part of you that connected with the experience.
Fast forward eight to ten years: adolescence. Changes abound – physical changes, mood shifts and of course, the opposite sex (hmm…why didn’t I notice this before, you asked yourself?) This time, you don’t quite acclimate, but you move through it and on to more change.
One day you wake up and discover you’re no longer a child. You’re a man, a woman. You marry or choose to remain single, you work, have children – or not, and your world opens to a whole new set of changes. Life is just that – beginnings and endings, births and deaths, starts and stops – change. It’s not change itself that’s most significant. How we respond to that change defines our quality of life.
If you’re a working parent trying to find your way back home, or if you’re a stay-at-home parent who needs an income, expect change that will rock your world. It may not be easy, but your commitment will see you through. Just take it a step at a time. It’ll all be worth it.
Are you contemplating a change of lifestyle? Would you like support? Please email me privately at successmadesimple.jc@gmail.com and I’ll sign you up for Two Months FREE Membership to my monthly Mama Come Home! teleclasses.
Judith Cassis,C.Ht. is a Personal Development Consultant with 26 years experience. Known as “The Bounce-Back Coach”, she works with people who are “bouncing back” from failure, loss or tragedy. Judith is co-owner of a small newspaper,Tidbits of Santa Clarita Valley, www.tidbitsscv.com a family business she and her husband, Lee Cadena run with their sons. Through a monthly teleseries, Mama Come Home, Judith supports mothers in staying home or returning home to raise their children.
Community, Family, Member Contributions
Do you work from home? Would you like to? More and more people are moving home to work, and I couldn’t be happier for them! Although the circumstances around these situations aren’t always the best; lost jobs for instance, I firmly believe that at least for women, families are much happier in the long run. Even if it means sacrificing a playroom for a home office, kids will have a better life with Mama close at hand. Trust me, it doesn’t take long to get used to picking up toys off the living room floor every night. Think of it as exercise. Back straight, bend, squat, up and again…2,3,4.
I went back to finish college when my firstborn was 3 months old. (Insert sound of heart wrenching). A couple of years later, after waiting tables for a full year while trying to launch my business, I was finally able to chuck my apron, pack my brief case and come home. I’m still working from home 25 years later. (Check my notes on face book for the whole story).
There were a couple of stints over those two and a half decades that I tried to – brace yourself, I’m about to say it – work a job. There. Whew! I got it out. Those experiences lasted about 6 months each and were truly wonderful in many ways, but honestly, I couldn’t wait to get back home. Besides, I was still running my home-based business so my work load was heavy.
Are you contemplating a change of lifestyle? Would you like support? Please email me privately at successmadesimple.jc@gmail.com and I’ll sign you up for Two Months FREE Membership to my monthly Mama Come Home! teleclasses.
Judith Cassis,C.Ht. is a Personal Development Consultant with 26 years experience. Known as “The Bounce-Back Coach”, she works with people who are “bouncing back” from failure, loss or tragedy. Judith is co-owner of a small newspaper,Tidbits of Santa Clarita Valley, www.tidbitsscv.com a family business she and her husband, Lee Cadena run with their sons. Through a monthly teleseries, Mama Come Home, Judith supports mothers in staying home or returning home to raise their children.
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