![Work/Life Balance Part IV – The To-Do List]()
Julianne Wish, Member Contributions
by Julianne Alvarez-Wish
A to-do list is a list of tasks to be completed or steps toward completing a project. DUH! We all know this – so what’s the point in going any further with this topic, right? Not so fast…
The reason we will continue is because it’s hard to argue the benefits that come from getting your commitments out of your cranium and into a consistent format.
Let’s begin by breaking down a to-do list by starting with the obvious: a to-do list should contain things that can and should be done. You say, DUH! again? You may be surprised to learn how many items wind up on to-do lists that don’t belong there – as well as how many are missed. So let’s continue on. To-do lists should have items on them that are:
- something for which you are responsible
- actions
- something that can be accomplished in a short period of time…say a sitting
- something that works toward achieving a larger goal
David Allen, in Getting Things Done, talks about the ‘next action’. He defines the next action as ‘the next physical activity that needs to be engaged in, in order to move the current reality toward completion’.
For example, most people might put something on their to-do list like ‘get ready for the trip’. The reality is that this is really a project (here comes my PM background). Projects should be broken down into the activities required to complete it. ‘Get ready for the trip’ is too vague. Instead, it should be broken down into activities such as:
- call the kennel to make reservations for dogs from x/xx to x/xx
- take suits to the dry cleaners
- go to the post office to stop mail delivery until x/xx
These are specific and actionable – it’s easy to determine when they are done. Notice theses are all physical activities. Breaking these projects down into physical activities will help you
- clearly and completely think through the project
- make it easier to complete the project
- make the project more manageable for you
By taking this approach and have a ‘proper’ to-do list you may find you’re really not as busy as you thought you were (because you are now working smarter!), you’re better organized and have a better handle on what needs to be done!
Julianne Alvarez-Wish is a military wife, mother, business owner, professional writer, blogger and legislative advocate. She is the Director of Communications for Our Milk Money, the Colorado State Leader for the National Association for Moms in Business and the owner of Buy By Mom and Buy By Mom Blog. She also blogs at Wishful Thinking. Her passion, purpose and goal is to help parents work from home so they can be home with their children.
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Direct Sales, Member Contributions
by Mona Colwell
These past few months we have worked to discover whether a direct sales business is your answer to working from home. If you have followed along this far, you probably ordered your starter set and maybe even had your first few sales. Congratulations!
You are now free from all the “what if’s” that could have held you back from giving an at-home business a try. Go ahead and dream about your future earnings potential, the prizes you will earn and the all expense paid trips that you will take as a top performer! Best yet, you ALREADY have everything that you need to be amazingly successful with your business!
You may be thinking, “What? How could that be?” The truth is that there is only one thing that sets successful consultants apart from those who are not successful. One simple word separates the ones who persist, stick it out through obstacles and keep their focus on the goal.
Two people may be from totally different backgrounds, live in entirely different locations, have different home situations and be equally successful with their businesses. Our environment only matters if we let it hold us back. For example, one parent may say that she can’t be successful because her kids are too small while another might say she is successful because her kids are small!
What makes the difference for the achievers? The ones who BELIEVE this business will work and BELIEVE that they can be successful will rise to the top! Our results in our business are the outward or physical results that come from the thoughts in our head – good or bad. If you think you can, you can!
Don’t you just love children’s books? They are filled with hope and words of encouragement. We honestly believe that our children can have anything that their heart desires. So how about us?
The best thing we can do for our business is to invest in ourselves and our positive thinking. This may sound easy enough but it takes hard work, persistence and commitment! It takes effort to be in a positive, believing state of mind every minute of every day.
However, the success of your business depends on it. If you know that your business depends on it and this area could literally make or break your business, would you find a way to make it a priority? I hope so… It starts with investing in listening, reading or watching something positive every day.
Start there and check back next time for 10 fabulous tips on creating powerful beliefs!
Mona Colwell is a work at home mom with 15 years direct sales experience. In addition to raising her three children, Mona has created a company for her almost famous husband, Emerson, and his children’s books, blogs for The Professional Women’s Network and recently transitioned to a brand new direct sales organization, Ava Anderson Non-Toxic.
Community, Family, Member Contributions
Why do we women divide and take sides over our issues? Breast vs bottle, home birth vs Epidural, and now the career mom vs the work at home variety – why do we think less of the woman who chooses another road, and worse yet, why does she think less of herself? We may not agree, but must we condemn one another for our choices?
There seems to be a lot of mud slinging going on these days between stay-at-home-moms and working moms. This saddens me! We’re sisters. Hasn’t the world doled out enough feminine oppression? Must we turn on each other? Because if we do, we’re really turning on ourselves. All that are as a gender was wrought by woman-to-woman support. We held each other up, stuck it out and stuck together, and the cost would be far too great for us to turn away from each other now.
For one reason or another, the choice to stay at home or work from home may not be available to everyone. Sometimes there are circumstances beyond our control. And sometimes it’s just not what they want. Who am I to judge?
Let’s not ask each other to feel guilty about our choices. Instead, let’s invite each other to examine our lives and recognize there are options. We’re not victims and we’re not stuck. IT’S NEVER TOO LATE to shift gears.
Are you contemplating a change of lifestyle? Would you like support? Please email me privately at successmadesimple.jc@gmail.com and I’ll sign you up for Two Months FREE Membership to my monthly Mama Come Home! teleclasses.
Judith Cassis,C.Ht. is a Personal Development Consultant with 26 years experience. Known as “The Bounce-Back Coach”, she works with people who are “bouncing back” from failure, loss or tragedy. Judith is co-owner of a small newspaper,Tidbits of Santa Clarita Valley, www.tidbitsscv.com a family business she and her husband, Lee Cadena run with their sons. Through a monthly teleseries, Mama Come Home, Judith supports mothers in staying home or returning home to raise their children.
daddysden, Family, Uncategorized
Stripper poles should not be a part of a home. If you own one and I’ve offended you I apologize (sorry mom), but I personally can’t imagine explaining it to my daughters. This new exercise fad serves as a reminder of all the stuff I’ve pushed aside as a responsible parent.
If I didn’t have kids I’d listen to more obscene radio morning show DJ’s with names like Crap Boy & Charlie (oh Crap Boy, you’re so funny and relatable). I’d pee with the door open. I could once again pick my nose anywhere in the house without a little voice nagging, “Put it in a Kleenex dad!” My computer’s music library wouldn’t have all the bad-titled songs “X’ed” out. And I would have a stripper pole. Twelve of them. Less for exercise and more for structural integrity… but yeah.
Come to think of it I’ve been style-shedding for quite some time. Getting married was the first blow. Suddenly my framed Aerosmith poster wasn’t good enough for the living room. Or the basement. Or the frame itself (Dear S. Tyler: I’m sorry*). Gone were the shot glasses above the TV. Everything I gave up was replaced in equal proportion by either a candle or another pillow.
*In a wildly unrelated side story that just crossed my mind: When I was 22 I loved Aerosmith. Borderline unhealthy admiration. Anyway, I was at a dance club trying my damndest to talk to/dance with/touch the shoulder of any girl who’d allow it. One took an interest and danced several songs with me until the DJ played a Run DMC Walk This Way remix. She yelled, “That’s awesome, I love Aerosmith.” My heart leapt. I reached into my wallet and pulled out a plastic embossed card with the wings logo on it and yelled back, “Me too, I’m in the fan club!” The remainder of the night I danced alone.
The change keeps coming in waves. My shower used to simply house soap, shampoo and a razor. Those items all multiplied and had smelly little babies that exfoliate, scrub, and silken. My shower has evolved into its current form… an explosion of rubber ducks, foam alphabet letters and Nick Jr. paraphernalia.
Everywhere I look I see things I’ve either given up or altered for the sake of my wife and kids. Why do we do it… as men, that is? Why we change for our spouses is easy – sex. A high percentage of living room Aerosmith posters directly correlate to a low percentage of boobies.
But why change for our children? They don’t care how badly we decorate. They don’t see the radio morning shows’ raunchy content as negative. They just soak it all up and shape their lives around it. Therein lays the answer.
We dads modify our behavior in hope of being better men, thus creating a better environment for our kids to be shaped. We give up or suppress the ugly in order to grow more beauty. Sure, some of the vices we enjoy as adults are fun and tough to give up, but one look at those innocent, inquisitive eyes and you’d sacrifice anything for them.
I’m a little winded by all this sappiness. I could stand to exercise. You got a pole at your place I can use? I’ll bring my own Aerosmith mix tape.
Nathan Bright is a 30-something stay-at-home dad who resides near St. Louis, MO. He is a husband to an amazing woman and father to a doubly amazing 2 year old little girl. His blessed home is scheduled to be even more blessed in March, as Nathan and his wife will welcome a second daughter to their family. When Nathan is not blogging for The Daddy’s Den, he writes and illustrates his own children’s books. Available for purchase immediately is Maddi Patti and her Stay-at-Home-Daddy.
Community, Member Contributions
By Judith Cassis
Having been self employed for most of my life and at the same time raising my kids I get a lot of questions asking how I managed to work from home without compromising my family. Well, I did it for 25 years, and I’m happy to tell the story. Why? Because I believe that it’s more important than ever for moms to come home.
Our kids are raising themselves and they need us! We blame the economy, inflation or the need for two incomes for taking us away from our children. But if we place our highest value on those little gremlins we bring into the world instead on the lifestyle we want to live, often times we can change course and create/supplement our income while staying at home with our kids.
I’m committed to supporting you, whatever your choice. Work at home part time, full time – whatever! When you decide to take the leap, I’ll be here. I won’t have all the answers, but I promise I’ll help look for them. Please email me privately at successmadesimple.jc@gmail.com and I’ll sign you up for Two Months FREE Membership to my monthly Mama, Come Home! teleclasses.
Judith Cassis,C.Ht. is a Personal Development Consultant with 26 years experience. Known as “The Bounce-Back Coach”, she works with people who are “bouncing back” from failure, loss or tragedy. Judith is co-owner of a small newspaper,Tidbits of Santa Clarita Valley, www.tidbitsscv.com a family business she and her husband, Lee Cadena run with their sons. Through a monthly teleseries, Mama Come Home, Judith supports mothers in staying home or returning home to raise their children.
daddysden, Dads, Family
I buried the Snickers on a mountain overlooking a pristine lake. The other hikers in my group ate theirs days prior…like animals, but not me. A candy bar was given to us halfway through our 150 mile hike in the Cascade Mountains back in 2003. Food being scarce, a saved treat such as a Snickers had more worth on a mountain than Lindsay Lohan driving a Marlboro truck into cell block eight. And I buried it.
Why? Sacrifice. Now I’m not so pious that I came out of those mountains with tablets, but I did feel a sacrifice of that magnitude would help scrub my soul (if it got muddy during my early 20s). History is now repeating itself.
Fast forward to present day. I’m poor. Poor is a bad descriptive word because in the grand scheme I’m a zillion times more fortunate than most of the world’s population. Let’s just say I’m justifiably frugal. I’m also socially extinct. Few visitors to the house, no outside associates, and maybe one RedBox rental a month keep me pretty contained. What’s the reason? *Snickers* Not the candy bar, I mean that I just snickered as I was getting ready to write this: Because I’m a stay-at-home parent. Yet again, I’m sacrificing.
My wife and I have chosen to sacrifice a ton to make this happen. It’s not very apparent just how much we’ve given up until we talk to other people. As I listen to them speak I hear my thoughts saying, “What do you mean you went out twice this week…I get to eat out once every 60 days!” But it’s worth it. We believe in what we’re doing so strongly that we’re willing to sacrifice a lot to do it.
Antenna television – yes. Willing to be the crazy coupon person in the check-out line- yes. Toilet paper square limit three – yes (modifications to this rule arise from time to time).
Again, it’s worth it. I truly believe my kids and family benefit as a whole immensely from having an at-home parent. I also feel the sacrifices in my life, such as the Snickers and self-imposed fiscal-chop, have made me stronger. When viewed in a certain light those things we give up don’t really seem to big. In fact, the intrinsic gain is so great it’s as if nothing has been given up at all.
Now if only I could find that Snickers coupon.
Nathan Bright is a 30-something stay-at-home dad who resides near St. Louis, MO. He is a husband to an amazing woman and father to a doubly amazing 2 year old little girl. His blessed home is scheduled to be even more blessed in March, as Nathan and his wife will welcome a second daughter to their family. When Nathan is not blogging for OurMilkMoney.com’s The Daddy’s Den, he writes and illustrates his own children’s books. Available for purchase immediately is Maddi Patti and her Stay-at-Home-Daddy.
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Direct Sales, Member Contributions
One of the benefits of a ‘business in a box’ is that part of your success will be based on your ability to duplicate certain skills that are common across many sales organizations. These include Network Marketing Skills, Communication Skills, Business Systems and Life Skills.
NETWORK MARKETING SKILLS: These are some ‘founding’ principles that are important to follow because they are already proven to work well within a direct sales organization. Successful business owners develop prospect lists, use scripts (for generating interest in their business, scheduling appointments, closing sales and following up with customers) and follow a specific presentation format for both the products and business opportunity.
COMMUNICATION SKILLS: The best communicators are the best listeners. They are able to uncover prospect’s needs and provide solutions. It’s important to ask questions and hear the answers before offering products that can potentially help your audience. Honing these skills will grow your business with lasting clients.
SUCCESS SYSTEMS: These are systems that are put in place to help run your business smoothly such as a website where your customers can order products, reports for tracking your personal team production, customer sales reports or inventory management. Today, many corporations offer these systems as part of their ‘back office’, freeing your time up so that you can be in the most important place which is in front of people presenting the products and the opportunity.
LIFE SKILLS: Successful entrepreneurs often demonstrate high ‘life’ skills which encompass:
- People skills – how you relate to others, attract customers and provide exceptional service
- Time management skills – creating and working by a schedule and focusing on income producing activities
- Emotional management – keeping your feelings in check and looking at every experience as an opportunity for growth
Many direct sales organizations will provide educational websites, CDs, podcasts and events to help you gain and improve these skills. A direct sales business is just like every other business, and not necessarily a ‘get rich scheme’. Rather, it is an opportunity for you to have easy entry into the marketplace where you can take advantage of an already established business model. By taking the time to learn these proven skills and then putting them into practice in the field, your results will be a fast growing, lucrative home based business.
Mona Colwell is a work at home mom with 15 years direct sales experience. In addition to raising her three children, Mona has created a company for her almost famous husband, Emerson, and his children’s books, blogs for The Professional Women’s Network and recently transitioned to a brand new direct sales organization, Ava Anderson Non-Toxic.
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Julianne Wish, Member Contributions
Having a planner – whether it be paper or electronic – is the first step to getting yourself organized. However, just having a planner in your possession isn’t enough – you need to use it and maximize it to make it work for you.
- Size. This is largely a matter of personal preference. Some people prefer large 8 1/2 x 11 planner while others may prefer a slim electronic version. It should comfortably fit in your purse or pocket.
- Views. You planner should have different views so you can look – at a glance – at a day, week, month, etc.
- Location. Always have it with you. It won’t help you if you always leave it somewhere.
- Recording. Write everything in your planner. Your planner should be the first place an event gets recorded. If you follow this your planner will be up-to-date and a good central reference for you.
- Access. Use a tab or paperclip to ‘today’ so you can quickly reference your schedule. Many electronic PDAs have this feature.
- Lists. Have ‘to-do-‘ lists and daily action plans. ‘To-do’ lists should be categorized. For example, home, family, social, business. Items from your ‘to-do’ list will will become items on your daily action plan so you can work toward accomplishing your ‘to-do’ lists.
- Time. Learn to estimate time. When you add ‘to-to’ list items to you daily action plan you need to determine how long they will take to accomplish. If you’re like most people, you underestimate how long this take. Be realistic.
- Color code. This is one of my favorites. Not only does color coding make you planner visually appealing, it makes it easy to see – at a glance – what your day, week, month is bringing. Use general topics for colors: family, finance, health, personal, spiritual, etc. Use a different color for each topic. Use highlighters for paper planners and different color fonts/highlights on your PDA.
- Contingency Planning. Take into account ‘what-ifs’ when planning. Things pop up – phone calls, traffic, long lines. Don’t pack your day so full that you cannot possibly get your list accomplished. When scheduling appointments, allow enough time in between for travel, meals, etc.
- Changes. Changes are OK! You have the right to change plans and priorities. Your planner works for you!
Your planner is not rigid. Be realistic – your planner works for you – not the other way around. Your planner should be a tool to help you achieve your goals.
Julianne Alvarez-Wish is a military wife, mother, business owner, professional writer, blogger and legislative advocate. She is the Director of Communications for Our Milk Money, the Colorado State Leader for the National Association for Moms in Business and the owner of Buy By Mom and Buy By Mom Blog. Her passion, purpose and goal is to help parents work from home so they can be home with their children.
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Resource Articles
If you are like most working parents, you’d prefer that your child not see a nanny, or the inside of a daycare, more than they see you. Well, here is some good news: becoming a self-employed parent is a possibility for everyone. Yes, even you. You are not alone in wanting more for children and parents everywhere are uniting together in support of a new movement that will increase your odds of work-at-home success. The Parent Entrepreneur community has grown exponentially over the last 5 years and it even comes with its own set of rules that will allow you to put family before your work. With meticulous planning, lowered expectations and a positive outlook you too can transition to becoming a work-at-home parent.
Many corporations are already on board with this new movement and are accepting more proposals to telecommute than ever before. For a basic telecommute proposal template to get you started visit: http://www.ourmilkmoney.com/resources .
You must be willing to make sacrifices. Quitting your job will most likely result in making major budget cuts and the need to make up for that lost income. Offer your skills in exchange for payment or barter, and be prepared to work a lot more for a lot less. Never take your eye off the prize: precious time with your children is priceless.
Self-employed Parent Enthusiast Ally Loprete is the Founder of OurMilkMoney.com, a nationwide online business directory of self-employed parents, and the host of This Little Parent Stayed Home, a live weekly radio show which is part of the Her Insight Group on Toginet.com. Ally is on a mission to help others deal with the sometimes overwhelming prospect of leaving a full time job to start a new business, while running a full time household and raising kids. She is resolute about creating a haven in which parents across the nation will continue to thrive and obtain the support they need in their personal journeys.
![Work/Life Balance Part IV – The To-Do List]()
Resource Articles
So, you’ve decided to become a full time stay-at-home parent. Re-evaluating your budget is one of the hardest first steps to letting go of that second income because it means you are going to have to let some things go. First, realize that just because you have to cut down on some indulgences does not mean you are living in poverty. You will survive. Start by taking a look at your credit card statements, your cell phone bills and your other spending habits. This will give you some clues where to cut first. Lower your cell phone plan minutes, brew your own coffee, use the library to borrow books and videos. Consider how often you use your gym membership and if your physical activity can be replaced by taking the kids for a walk or joining a weekly stroller strides group. Start a ‘swap’ group in your community and rotate things like videos, toys and books. Instead of meeting friends out for drinks, which now includes the price of a babysitter, invite them over for game night. Let go of your season tickets and watch the games on TV for free, or check your local listings for community events such as free concerts in the park. Most likely, you will begin to enjoy the creative activities that you are able to come up with as a family. On the rare occasion that you are able to hire a sitter and get out with your grown-up friends, it will mean more to you than it ever did before.
Self-employed Parent Enthusiast Ally Loprete is the Founder of OurMilkMoney.com, a nationwide online business directory of self-employed parents, and the host of This Little Parent Stayed Home, a live weekly radio show which is a part of the Her Insight Group on Toginet.com. Ally is on a mission to help others deal with the sometimes overwhelming prospect of leaving a full time job to start a new business, while running a full time household and raising kids. She is resolute about creating a haven in which parents across the nation will continue to thrive and obtain the support they need in their personal journeys.
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